Friday, January 21, 2005
Yo, I'm apart of this fabulous, fabulous, fabulous collection of novellas (Love Is Never Painless) due out in the summer so I couldn't resist sharing this little teaser from the story. I loved writing this novella called "Love Is To Blame" for this collection. I was asked to write something from the perspective of a man showing perhaps the affects of a wounded heart... I think I did pretty good so check it out when it hits the racks! (smile) For now, peep out this little excerpt... Oh..and I sort of enhanced the cover in my favor here so when you see it in the stores, it wont be the same...wink...(smile)
Shaylisa Jones loves to eat Pecans and drink Sparkling Cider late at night. She usually ends her day that way, along with reading a good book or calling up her girlfriend she’d met recently, about two months ago. Their meeting each other struck an instant cord of sisterhood and friendship. No subject is ever taboo between them but so far, time had not allowed for all their past experiences to be revealed. Recently, most of their conversations involved complaining about men. They wondered why most, if not all of the ones they knew seemed to have the same first name, Ex.
Shaylisa has had to deal with several by that first name but only one makes her wonder if she’d said goodbye a little too fast. Two years is a long time to just throw something away on a whim. How could she possibly wake up one morning, thinking and wondering about somebody else being the ideal man in her life? When did the man she was seeing become less exciting to her? When did things change? Doesn’t it matter that he gave her so much? Did she ever really care about him in the first place? Doesn’t she remember all the dreams she talked about sharing with him? She even looked him in the eye one day, assuring him that she hadn’t changed her mind about him being “the one.” She was probably motivated to lie because she and Malcolm were enjoying an all expense paid vacation at a resort in Palm Springs. All expenses were paid by him, as was always the case.
“Girl, I’m sick of trying to explain myself! Why can’t he just move on?” Shaylisa asked her girlfriend.
“Does he call you a lot?”
“No, he doesn’t call me. I got caller ID so I know he’s never called me since we broke up.”
“You mean, since you broke things off.”
“You know what I mean, girl.”
“Uh huh, so, why you frustrated with him?”
“Cause I got this letter from him. It just screwed up my whole day too! Almost made me want to call him up and curse his ass out.”
“Why, was it that bad?”
“Not really bad, just one of those guilt trip letters. Plus, I guess he doesn’t want any memories of me because he put all the pictures he had of us, of me, in the same envelope as the letter and sent them.”
“Damn, that man is wounded girl. I hope he doesn’t pass that pain on to someone else.”
“Should I feel guilty about that?” Shaylisa replied on the defensive.
“I’m not saying that, it’s just…”
“Listen, it’s not like I just disappeared one day. I didn’t leave some funky message on his voicemail. I told him in person how I felt and what I no longer felt about him.”
“Then why are you feeling so guilty now?”
“Because of the letter… He’s not a bad person. I don’t know. Can we just change the subject?”
Shaylisa couldn’t take what she was feeling. Instead of drinking Sparkling Cider, she put her girlfriend on hold so she could go in the kitchen and poured herself a glass of Merlot. Shaylisa brought the whole bottle with her and turned off the television before picking up the phone again.
“You still there, Cindy?”
“I’m here, what did you just do?”
“Poured a glass of Merlot ‘cause I need something to calm my nerves down right now.”
“You sound like an old woman! What were you watching anyway?”
“The Sopranos… Although to be honest, I’m not really in the mood to watch anything tonight.”
“Yeah, I turned my TV off a long time ago, girl.”
“Hope I’m not keeping you up too late Cindy?”
“No, before I called you, I was talking to this guy I met this past Saturday.”
“Yeah, he’s fine, girlfriend. He seems to love talking and I don’t mind listening to him, either. I think we might be going out next weekend.”
“Seems like you’re not sure about him?”
“I only hesitate because he seems like a player. I mean, I met him at Venice Beach and for all I know, he probably collected a hand full of phone numbers besides mine. I’d rather be alone than to be with some man I got to share.”
“I hear you. I guess I never had that problem with my ex cause all he wanted to do was spend time with me. I couldn’t bribe him to spend time with somebody else.”
“Well, this guy seems like any lady in his life would come second to his own ego.”
“He’s that bad?”
“Hard to say, but it seems like it.”
“That’s funny Cindy. Girl, maybe you should just leave his ass before you even start down that road.”
“Don’t think I haven’t thought about it Shaylisa. That’s why I turned down his offer to have Sunday brunch. But, he got this sexy voice that had me rocking my leg back and forth when we talked tonight. He was saying some stuff to me that, oh my God…”
Cindy laughed as she anticipated Shaylisa’s next question.
“Did you just have phone sex with that man?”
“No, I didn’t!”
“Cindy Griffith, did you?” Shaylisa repeated her question, waiting for an affirmative answer.
“Girl, I almost did but I held my ground. He definitely stirred a little something inside of me but I had to end that conversation and tell him that I’d call him later during the week.”
“What did he say to that?”
“He just brushed it off and said, cool. You know how men with huge egos try play like nothing disappoints them.”
“Yeah, I guess so. I mean, that’s the thing about my ex, if I told him that I needed to go somewhere, he’d say it was okay and then he’d tell me that he’ll miss me until the next time.” Shaylisa said while imitating a sweet sounding man.
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing, I guess, I mean…”
“Shaylisa, I know we haven’t known each other that long so I can’t really say much about your ex, but you have me constantly wondering who’s the real villain in your breakup. But, don’t get mad and think that I’m putting you down…”
“No, it’s okay Cindy. You have a right to question it, but all I can say is that for whatever reason I woke up one morning not feeling like I wanted to see him any more. I wanted to see someone different, if I was to see anyone at all.” Shaylisa attempted to explain.
Her words only revealed uncertainty or a sense of not really knowing what she wanted in a man or wanted for herself. The trouble with her indecision was that across town she had a man who in the six months since they parted ways, has yet to move on with his own life. Malcolm’s feelings for Shaylisa ran deep as the ocean and right now, his heart pounded constantly against the wall of his chest, similar to the waves crashing along the shoreline.