Sunday, January 28, 2007

Shot of the weekend..



The above image is my favorite shot of the weekend. I took it while driving. I pointed my camera without even looking through the viewfinder. I knew I'd capture something but I didn't expect to capture such a powerful story in one shot..

Short story for a collection inspired by a friend..



I sat in a strange airport looking like I'd lost everything that ever belonged to me. I was feeling like a brother from another planet. My luggage; I didn't know where it was, though I knew where it was going. I felt some kind of relief knowing that I still had my camera, my mac and other important items inside my carry on bag. I even had a change of underwear just in case I needed to be fresh when it came to that stuff. Traveling when everything goes wrong is the worse struggle a first-time-traveling-east brotha could experience. I was stuck in the Chicago airport. My luggage was on its way to LA without me and I could already picture somebody picking up my shit and walking right out the door with it. Even though they give you those baggage claim tickets, LA is notorious for not even checking. You can pick up a bag and walk right out the door, no problem unless the owner sees you doing it.

As I sat in Chicago, I decided to just chill and wait for the delayed flight to arrive. I had no choice when it came to waiting but I did have a choice on whether I'd sit there in a state of woe-is-me reflection or would I make the best of this situation and open myself up to observing my surroundings. I chose to observe. I couldn't help it. There were so many different people walking by with determined looks on their faces. Everybody trying to get somewhere. You could tell which person had either been here before or possibly lived here because they were relaxed and even smiling a bit. They could walk forward and not really pay attention to the confusing signs pointing in all directions. Then I noticed the people that I could relate to more. They looked confused. Their faces were scrunched up, trying to figure out which direction to go. Some looking for gates and other's looking for the direction of the baggage claim. I could definitely relate to what they were going through. I snapped a few pictures. My camera was like my best friend. I could point it in any direction and somehow capture something interesting. I was photographing shoes, legs, body parts, people in nearby airport cafe's deep in conversation, and others at the magazine rack, thumbing through the pages. My camera is digital so I basically experienced instant gratification. I took the shot and looked at the results. I was having fun...



Then I noticed this young lady, lost in a crowd of travelers that had just gotten off of an arriving plane. I took a shot of her pulling headphones out of her purse. She was cute. She looked asian; probably japanese. She sat down in the waiting area across from mine. She was dressed in this brown heavy looking coat, perfect for Chicago weather though it didn't look like this was her last stop. I took a shot of her. She dropped her bag and knelt down really fast so I missed. Then she sat down and appeared to have turned on her music because she was bobbing her head a little bit, closing her eyes and smiling. I took a picture of that. I had to shoot three quick shots before I captured the moment perfectly. People were walking by and blocking my view. I felt like a stalker when others were watching me photograph this lady but I didn't care. Once I was able to block out other's looking at me, I was in a whole nother zone. It was just me and her; this mystery asian lady. I was in sync with the bobbing of her head. It was almost as if I could hear the music she was listening to. I captured more shots of her. She moved her head slightly to the left and I snapped away. She smiled when looking to the right; I caught her again. There was something special about her. I could feel her spirit and I imagined different scenarios. Not so much me with her in the romantic sense but me just getting to know her and seeing her in a different light. That kind of shine that allows me to see and witness the real person underneath those headphones.



I got lost in my imagination to the point where I didn't see the young lady get up from her seat. I thought maybe someone was blocking my view but when they moved, she was no longer in that seat. I visually searched around but didn't see her. I celebrated quietly the fact that I'd captured her with my camera. It was a beautiful way to spend my time waiting in a Chicago airport for a delayed flight. Two seconds later, they announced it was time to board the plane. One minute after that I'd left my seat to stand in line. I'd seen the young asian lady sitting down in the very same seat that I sat in. I smiled and when she looked in my direction; she saw me. She looked away but then she looked again. She bashfully released her own smile in my direction. I boarded the plane feeling light on my feet with a beautiful vision to see in my dreams as I slept on the plane for the next few hours. When I arrived in LA, I prayed that my luggage was waiting for me and if it wasn't, I was at least feeling good enough to not let my anger get the best of me. I'd have to thank that lovely lady for the good feeling.





Copr.2007 Brief Moments Of Wished Upon Destiny

Written for someone who wanted to say this...



From the desk of love.... Every coming weekend felt like Christmas.. The anticipation so great because of all the words whispered through space and time. We shared real honest feelings with one another. We talked about more than just the future; we talked about now. She let me into her life in ways that as a man I must never take for granted. Allstar weekend, the Superbowl; none of that stuff got in the way or came before my lady but thank the lord and knock on many pieces of wood; my lady understands the enjoyment I get from those moments in life. I repay her with an extra dose of lovin and spoiling her with sincere effort. That's all it takes is real true effort. The best motivation for creativity is love. The best inspiration being the infinite possibility of the depths of that love... And then she'd ask me "where did you come from?" or complimenting my mother for doing a great job of raising me. I'd stop her from most of the compliments and thank her at the same time. I don't want to be placed on a pedestal because with the good comes the bad. I'm human so there will be times when I'll say the wrong thing. There will be moments when something rubs me the wrong way. I'm a passionate man. Honest. I react and with being human, reaction time is sometimes a little off and thus, feelings are hurt by something said. The downtimes ensue. But, when a man is true to the love he's been blessed with, it doesn't take forever to recognize the words of that Gladys Knight song. "Your the best thing that ever happened to me..." even if I'm new school and that was old... When a man is true with his actions and pursuit of a woman's love and respect, that mantra becomes etched in his heart and nothing should get in the way. He's motivated to live a little longer, breathe a little better, succeed a little stronger.. Make his destiny all about her and when God takes him away, he won't be afraid because he gave his best effort to do what he felt he was put on this earth to do....L-O-V-E...

Sunday, January 21, 2007

History..



Hanging out in Atlanta with my mother over the weekend, I started to have a grandmother memory. I thought about my father's mother, mostly because my mother and I walked the streets near so many MLK monuments and also when I got home to Cali, my eyes glanced at something my grandmother cherished a great deal. This memory was sort of like a quick flashback of my grandmother, Senora. I remembered when she told me the story of how she was in Dallas when Kennedy was assasinated. She said she was coming out of a nearby store with a friend of hers and as soon as they saw people scattering and voices shouting the president was killed, she and her girlfriend got out of Dallas as quickly as they could. She said to me as she recalled this memory "they killed that boy so I went home and got my bible." The same sort of thing happened when MLK was killed. She said she went into the room, got her bible and prayed. Then many years later as she lay in bed unable to move her own body and unable to really communicate very well, I sat in her bedroom with her watching a news report about JFK Jr. when he died in the plane crash. They showed his face with his birth and death years at the bottom of the screen. Grandma asked "he dead?" I answered yes and noticed as she turned her head in the direction of that same old bible, unable to reach for it, she just gazed at it for a moment and then she closed her eyes... This very same bible that she picked up seemingly whenever something tragic occured as I mentioned is with me now. And as I walked the streets of Atlanta over the weekend with my mother, I couldn't help but think about not only my grandmother, but also about history itself especially as it relates to the recent events of this country seen through the eyes of someone whose lived enough years to experience it all in their own way; me... I got a little bit of history under my belt now but it sure is a blessing to see, hear and talk with someone whose seen and even experienced more than me... To be around history is a powerful thing; living or in spirit...

*note to my ATL friends* ==smile== I'll be back soon.. I just had to do this very special trip for my mother and to show her Atlanta for the first time. It was a very special time, we had a blast and I was proud to show her an important recent accomplishment of mine... *

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Feels good to be a gentleman...



Even in the midst of all the booty-booty everywhere, it's nice to be a gentleman... I like doing it most times just because the old fashion, come to the rescue type of acts are filed in the same category as dinosaur bones... It's like an old relic of society as it's become cool to watch a lady struggle while you go on about your business, pull up your sagging pants, step through the door first and let her get the car door herself! Let's step back in time for a moment to today... I played the role of a rescuer, so to speak.. coming to the aid of a lady who just looked way too sad for words... Yeah, she was attractive.. I was guilty of first being motivated by that real time fantasy but I also felt bad for her.. This moment happened at a hand carwash. I guess she didn't want to go to the regular carwash where someone could wash her mini-van for her. She had two kids inside who sat patiently in their car seats. The lady got on her cellphone at first. I got the feeling she was calling her man. Maybe he was supposed to be there for her, washing the car so she wouldn't have to struggle with the kids... She appeared even angrier once she got off the phone. She told the kids to stay inside as she washed the car. It was both sad and funny to see her work the water hose thing and wash her mini-van. She was dressed in black sweats and a baseball cap pulled down over her head. Maybe it was a bad hair day for her but she still looked cute; no make up at all.. After she washed the car she pulled forward in the area where you dry your vehicle. That's when she really looked pissed. She just sat there. The kids sat quietly looking and I imagine they were trying to figure out what was wrong with mommy. I was done wiping off and drying my car. I turned my engine on and looked in her direction. She saw me and gave me a half smile; probably too tired and pissed off to give me the full version of her smile. I motioned for her to roll her window down. First I asked if she was okay. She just shrugged and gave me that half smile again. I said to her "I'll wipe your car for you, alright? You stay inside, no problem.." She was shocked of course because as I said, chivalry is ancient history...

So, I got some of my towels and wiped her mini-van off.. It didn't take long. I noticed her license plate was Louisiana. That gave me a little smile. One of my favorite states to escape to. When I was almost done she got out and said "thank you, I really dont know what to say... I mean, do I tip you? I mean-"
"Nah, I'm cool.. You just seemed like you needed a hand..." I told her.

I got the full version of her smile then and a little disbelieving nod of her head... I told her to hold up so I could give her a copy of my book. I gave her "Love Is Never Painless." I think my story inside is probably perfect timing for her and maybe somewhere out there when she has a moment to read it, she'll smile again... the full version... I drove off after that and she was still in disbelief but seemed very thankful... As I said, it feels good to be a gentleman...

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

2007...double-O-seven?



Life is soooo uncertain but sometimes you just gotta go for it... I've decided most recently to really take a look at and prepare for my future. To have some kind of security, if you will and to also have fun in the process of making sure all things are secure.. Still, it's at times scary... and then other times my confident spirit kicks in and my focus is intense... I basically know what I want and how to get there but one never knows what's around the corner... or who.. ya just never know anything, basically but you try to prepare and to hopefully learn from the past as well as the present...

New Year's morning I woke up thinking about putting together a little year end review like I typically do but I felt no motivation to do so.. Most of what happened in 2006 I can't really remember.. It's like it's a blur to me and most of it I dont want to remember by making myself remember.. I'd rather it come to me in the form of wisdom..that quiet voice that tells me "yeah, that's a good move.." or "no, dont go there... " So, I'm gonna skip the year end review stuff.. Pretty much the two major cornerstones of this year kind of make everything else a blur and that's the loss of my grandmother and the incredible rejuvenation provided by the trip that I went on during the month of November. I end the year taking major steps toward a dream and hopefully in 2007 a couple more dreams come true as I do my part in working toward making them a reality. Life is scary and it's amazing.. Life is uncertain and it's for real... Life is short and yet it takes forever to reveal what you hope to see... I pray my decisions are good, sound, and right for me... until that blessed time or moment when it becomes right for we...us... yet I can't claim that as part of my focus... not yet..