Monday, October 20, 2008

Life and Death

I know someone who embraces the possibility of death though I can tell she's hiding from her true feelings. She hides a lot even in the presence of others. She has no clue about death. She's prepared? She paid for all her funeral costs, her program, and mapped out how everything should be. Nah, she's not prepared... It shows in how she handles her believed to be final days and how she struggles with her illness more in frustration than actual fight... I picture her in the final moments panicking because basically, she'd stepped over the process by which one should take time to come to grips with their own journey. Her ascension will be filled with panic and worry rather than a peaceful, ready, and embracing transition.

I remember a long time ago I used to imagine to myself about why people die or perhaps are chosen to go. Maybe its kind of silly but in a way I used to think that in some cases, God takes those who "understand" and leaves behind those who need more time to figure things out. This person underestimates her time and will probably be around a lot longer than she imagines or believes, thus she'll waste time sitting around wondering "when" rather than living, loving, and enjoying life to the fullest... Other's might go before her and this loss will weigh heavy on her heart as she tries to figure out why... I always believe that things make more sense when you can look beyond yourself... If she finds it, it won't happen until discovery becomes too late.

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