Wednesday, April 23, 2008
I hate to be like I’ve got all the answers because I screwed up royally. I made ill decisions and lost a lot; still paying for it today. Still sinking in a deeper hole and waiting on someone to discover the real side of sincerity. Waiting; I do way too much of. Giving benefit of the doubt; I do beyond too much of. Believing in and often proven wrong. I’ll probably see an early grave; a victim of stress related, heart flip flopping in my chest, reverberating to the sounds of voices saying I was a good person but when does that matter except when looking back. Reflection ripples in life like pebbles tossed in the pond. I’m sometimes amazed just at how much of my life I can look at. Those times when I couldn’t see the forrest for the trees but despite all that wasn’t right I still searched and waited for the beauty. Living, working and hoping that it would be alright. Things are supposed to get better at some point. Why go downhill forever? Why not try to soar above the BS and find happiness? Pull yourself out of the debris, step over the mud and laugh about that little bit that got on your clothes. It don’t matter. Somebody watches over you enough to give you strength to brush that stuff off your shoulders. Somebody’s got love for you and someone sees everything in you that makes sense… or so I'd like to believe... imagine... live... it's gonna be alright, most days.