Written for someone who wanted to say this...

From the desk of love.... Every coming weekend felt like Christmas.. The anticipation so great because of all the words whispered through space and time. We shared real honest feelings with one another. We talked about more than just the future; we talked about now. She let me into her life in ways that as a man I must never take for granted. Allstar weekend, the Superbowl; none of that stuff got in the way or came before my lady but thank the lord and knock on many pieces of wood; my lady understands the enjoyment I get from those moments in life. I repay her with an extra dose of lovin and spoiling her with sincere effort. That's all it takes is real true effort. The best motivation for creativity is love. The best inspiration being the infinite possibility of the depths of that love... And then she'd ask me "where did you come from?" or complimenting my mother for doing a great job of raising me. I'd stop her from most of the compliments and thank her at the same time. I don't want to be placed on a pedestal because with the good comes the bad. I'm human so there will be times when I'll say the wrong thing. There will be moments when something rubs me the wrong way. I'm a passionate man. Honest. I react and with being human, reaction time is sometimes a little off and thus, feelings are hurt by something said. The downtimes ensue. But, when a man is true to the love he's been blessed with, it doesn't take forever to recognize the words of that Gladys Knight song. "Your the best thing that ever happened to me..." even if I'm new school and that was old... When a man is true with his actions and pursuit of a woman's love and respect, that mantra becomes etched in his heart and nothing should get in the way. He's motivated to live a little longer, breathe a little better, succeed a little stronger.. Make his destiny all about her and when God takes him away, he won't be afraid because he gave his best effort to do what he felt he was put on this earth to do....L-O-V-E...

History..

Hanging out in Atlanta with my mother over the weekend, I started to have a grandmother memory. I thought about my father's mother, mostly because my mother and I walked the streets near so many MLK monuments and also when I got home to Cali, my eyes glanced at something my grandmother cherished a great deal. This memory was sort of like a quick flashback of my grandmother, Senora. I remembered when she told me the story of how she was in Dallas when Kennedy was assasinated. She said she was coming out of a nearby store with a friend of hers and as soon as they saw people scattering and voices shouting the president was killed, she and her girlfriend got out of Dallas as quickly as they could. She said to me as she recalled this memory "they killed that boy so I went home and got my bible." The same sort of thing happened when MLK was killed. She said she went into the room, got her bible and prayed. Then many years later as she lay in bed unable to move her own body and unable to really communicate very well, I sat in her bedroom with her watching a news report about JFK Jr. when he died in the plane crash. They showed his face with his birth and death years at the bottom of the screen. Grandma asked "he dead?" I answered yes and noticed as she turned her head in the direction of that same old bible, unable to reach for it, she just gazed at it for a moment and then she closed her eyes... This very same bible that she picked up seemingly whenever something tragic occured as I mentioned is with me now. And as I walked the streets of Atlanta over the weekend with my mother, I couldn't help but think about not only my grandmother, but also about history itself especially as it relates to the recent events of this country seen through the eyes of someone whose lived enough years to experience it all in their own way; me... I got a little bit of history under my belt now but it sure is a blessing to see, hear and talk with someone whose seen and even experienced more than me... To be around history is a powerful thing; living or in spirit...

*note to my ATL friends* ==smile== I'll be back soon.. I just had to do this very special trip for my mother and to show her Atlanta for the first time. It was a very special time, we had a blast and I was proud to show her an important recent accomplishment of mine... *

Feels good to be a gentleman...

Even in the midst of all the booty-booty everywhere, it's nice to be a gentleman... I like doing it most times just because the old fashion, come to the rescue type of acts are filed in the same category as dinosaur bones... It's like an old relic of society as it's become cool to watch a lady struggle while you go on about your business, pull up your sagging pants, step through the door first and let her get the car door herself! Let's step back in time for a moment to today... I played the role of a rescuer, so to speak.. coming to the aid of a lady who just looked way too sad for words... Yeah, she was attractive.. I was guilty of first being motivated by that real time fantasy but I also felt bad for her.. This moment happened at a hand carwash. I guess she didn't want to go to the regular carwash where someone could wash her mini-van for her. She had two kids inside who sat patiently in their car seats. The lady got on her cellphone at first. I got the feeling she was calling her man. Maybe he was supposed to be there for her, washing the car so she wouldn't have to struggle with the kids... She appeared even angrier once she got off the phone. She told the kids to stay inside as she washed the car. It was both sad and funny to see her work the water hose thing and wash her mini-van. She was dressed in black sweats and a baseball cap pulled down over her head. Maybe it was a bad hair day for her but she still looked cute; no make up at all.. After she washed the car she pulled forward in the area where you dry your vehicle. That's when she really looked pissed. She just sat there. The kids sat quietly looking and I imagine they were trying to figure out what was wrong with mommy. I was done wiping off and drying my car. I turned my engine on and looked in her direction. She saw me and gave me a half smile; probably too tired and pissed off to give me the full version of her smile. I motioned for her to roll her window down. First I asked if she was okay. She just shrugged and gave me that half smile again. I said to her "I'll wipe your car for you, alright? You stay inside, no problem.." She was shocked of course because as I said, chivalry is ancient history...

So, I got some of my towels and wiped her mini-van off.. It didn't take long. I noticed her license plate was Louisiana. That gave me a little smile. One of my favorite states to escape to. When I was almost done she got out and said "thank you, I really dont know what to say... I mean, do I tip you? I mean-"
"Nah, I'm cool.. You just seemed like you needed a hand..." I told her.

I got the full version of her smile then and a little disbelieving nod of her head... I told her to hold up so I could give her a copy of my book. I gave her "Love Is Never Painless." I think my story inside is probably perfect timing for her and maybe somewhere out there when she has a moment to read it, she'll smile again... the full version... I drove off after that and she was still in disbelief but seemed very thankful... As I said, it feels good to be a gentleman...

2007...double-O-seven?

Life is soooo uncertain but sometimes you just gotta go for it... I've decided most recently to really take a look at and prepare for my future. To have some kind of security, if you will and to also have fun in the process of making sure all things are secure.. Still, it's at times scary... and then other times my confident spirit kicks in and my focus is intense... I basically know what I want and how to get there but one never knows what's around the corner... or who.. ya just never know anything, basically but you try to prepare and to hopefully learn from the past as well as the present...

New Year's morning I woke up thinking about putting together a little year end review like I typically do but I felt no motivation to do so.. Most of what happened in 2006 I can't really remember.. It's like it's a blur to me and most of it I dont want to remember by making myself remember.. I'd rather it come to me in the form of wisdom..that quiet voice that tells me "yeah, that's a good move.." or "no, dont go there... " So, I'm gonna skip the year end review stuff.. Pretty much the two major cornerstones of this year kind of make everything else a blur and that's the loss of my grandmother and the incredible rejuvenation provided by the trip that I went on during the month of November. I end the year taking major steps toward a dream and hopefully in 2007 a couple more dreams come true as I do my part in working toward making them a reality. Life is scary and it's amazing.. Life is uncertain and it's for real... Life is short and yet it takes forever to reveal what you hope to see... I pray my decisions are good, sound, and right for me... until that blessed time or moment when it becomes right for we...us... yet I can't claim that as part of my focus... not yet..

L-O-V-E

This morning I received an email with the title "Love Took The Change Out Of Me." I kept lookin at those words and was thinking that something looked awful familiar about it. Then I realized it was a title of a chapter that I had written in my story "Love Is 2 Blame," which is featured in the Love Is Never Painless anthology... I started to smile because once again I had received another beautiful response to my story. This lady told me that that last chapter was very inspirational for her so she had to email me and let me know. That's an incredible feeling and one that I've been experiencing just about everyday for the past three weeks thanks to everyone emailing me about how much the story has touched them... The emotions in that story are very real, some of the words taken from my own experiences, the feelings taken from my own hopes, dreams and disappointments, the characters....my imagination...

I have to send a shoutout to this young lady named Keysha who said my story inspired her to make a life decision.. Her decision was not to choose a relationship(s) she was unsure of but to instead choose herself. From what I could tell based on the options she mentioned, she made the best choice for her...

Love is something you gotta be sure about 'cause love is to blame for everything... good and bad..

Dreamgirl experience..

Tonight I had a pretty interesting and funny, movie experience... Dreamgirls... ahhh... beautiful people up on the screen but the most enjoyable part for me was before the movie. I typically am amazed by the action before the film starts. Watching folks decide where they're gonna sit and seeing everybody involved in various conversations. I also always seem to have the loudest popcorn eater sit right behind me. I dont know why that always happens. Tonight was no exception to all of that except this felt more like a concert audience than a movie audience with all the various outfits, beautiful women, and men trying to be too cool.. There were definitely some fine looking ladies and one gigantic haired lady with a super skinny body trying to find a seat. I'm grateful she sat nowhere near me because her hair/afro was just way too big.. Then I also noticed this really fine latina with long dark hair and brooding eyes walking up the steps and coming in my direction. She eye'd the seats next to me so I had a feeling that's where she was gonna sit. As she got closer I realized the big football looking brotha behind her was with her too. I didn't recognize him though we nodded at each other but the stunning latina I did recognize. I'll throw out the name(Ice La Fox) though most reading this will still not know who I speak of...lol.. As the movie was playing I had to look at her a couple times not because I recognized her but because thank God the seats next to her were empty because she was acting like she was seven feet tall and couldn't get her legs in a comfortable position. Sometimes she sat up, other times she stretched out...back and forth... and the big brotha just sipped his drink, yawned a lot and sat unmoved by what was showing on the screen...

Ahhh..Dreamgirls... For me personally, ummm.. it was okay... I wasn't moved by what I saw either though I enjoyed some of the music. I loved seeing everybody on the screen that was there. The casting was perfect but I just wasn't really feeling it completely or at least not enough to walk out of the theatre wanting to tell everyone they must see it. I liked it enough to say "hey check it out because you'll probably like it more than I did" *smile* but for me something was missing just as it was with that Will Smith movie... That certain something that just hits you, makes you feel like you're watching something amazing, grabs you emotionally sort of like what Jamie did in Ray. Dreamgirls wasn't it for me but I'm sure folks will love it.. Hopefully anyone seeing it wont be distracted by loud popcorn eating or laughter whenever the characters breakout in song.. Seems like some audiences today dont realize or recognize what a "musical" is. They forget that in telling the story, the characters sing... it's a musical..

Anyway, I did see a really funny preview tonight for a new movie coming with Chris Rock. It's called "I Think I Love My Wife" or something like that and it looks like something that folks can relate to... temptation and how to deal with it...or not.. *smile*

Happy fabulous Christmas to everyone.. The year is almost over... We lost the Godfather of Soul on Christmas Day.. RIP, James Brown.. Life continues on though, doesn't it? It' amazing all that we have these days.. the technology and the world at our fingertips.. The kind of information and advances to allow for learning a lot faster but human behavior and various mentalities really prevent society from truly making a step forward.. Personally, I think our best days and times our behind us.. I'm sure we're gonna have fun and do big thangs in this "keepin it real" world but back in the day was the real fun that admittedly we took for granted, during my time, before my time and probably generations ago but as a person who is growing quite fond of the past, it's never too late to recognize just what we had.. Yeah, we had issues with the whole civil rights stuff and all sorts of other movements.. Crimes being committed on people of color but despite all that, family was important and love mean't a great deal.. People of color went hand in hand with people of strength even when we of today's times misinterpretted those moments of strength..

Today, I had fun reminiscing with someone about pancakes.. This person talked about how her mother in Arkansas made her pancakes with the slightly crunchy edges.. *smile* I love those too.. I often did that by mistake even when I was trying to make pancakes like they do at the restaurant, so smooth and light... All that talk of pancakes reminded me of the summers I spent in Mt. Pleasant(east Texas) with my grandparents.. My grandmother(Senora) spoiled me with fresh milk straight from the cow, fresh eggs that I sometimes picked out myself, and pancakes made from scratch.. Some real country cooking on the farm.. She put some pounds on me so when I got back home in LA my mother would put me on a diet right away... Incredible days, sweet memories...

This past week I've been in touch with a relative that I never met before. He called me all the way from Delaware. A man named James Royal originally from Daingerfield, Texas with an incredible amount of information about family going way way back. The information is really something and of course it points out we weren't a perfect people but we were strong.. We were hardworkers. We owned and developed some beautiful land but typically the most fascinating stories are the ones about the drugs, crime, affairs of the heart, etc etc.. James shared with me information about his great grandfather Ben Royal born in 1860. This man had a white father and it's assumed that his mixed features were what made him attractive to women because he had plenty and took advantage of this constantly.. He fathered many many children, some of them with relatives like an attractive cousin or a sister-in-law that caught his eye. And all these women lived pretty close to him, sometimes even living on the same farm which he did very well at.. Most men back then and in these areas of east Texas had farms. There were even some women who did very well in these small towns.. We always hear about the struggles of black people back in the day but somehow there was folks making money and doing very well in spite of those struggles and predjudices.. My great great grandmother Mariah was described in one of the documents that James found as "Rivers family matriarch, Mariah, was a woman of substance and ingenuity with vast land holdings and a church named in her honor." She first built the church herself after slavery ended. The church still bears her name today but the tradition is being lost to the new generation who chooses to forget rather than to honor... That's the problem today... folks make the choice to forget thinking the past wasn't cool or had no relation to what's going on now.. My next book shows how incredible the past was and how it's so much a part of what some wish for today, everyday; wondering what happened to love...true love... Until Again is some powerful stuff and it came to be that way because I've chosen not to forget... My choice is a discovery that I wish I had made many many years ago.. I think if I had, I'd be a lot farther along in life but no matter because it still feels good.. You want excitement, love, danger, strength, happiness, sadness, passion, romance, tragedy, perseverence...look to the past..

Christmas traditional no longer..

Christmas eve I woke up feeling lazy but that feeling couldn't stop me from getting up, getting dressed and making my way from the valley to the city. I had to go in the direction that I'd travel for many years in the past to visit my grandmother.. Only this time the tradition included a detour... I can't go over to Adams Blvd and take the elevator up to my grandmother's apartment where the smell of good holiday food would hit you the moment you got off the elevator. I'd also hear the sounds of my grandmother's voice, my aunt Tamer's voice, my mother's voice, and maybe a few other's like uncle Charles and Richard and aunt Dee Dee. all those voices blending together to make up that familiar sound known as family.. Then you can add a few extra ingredients like my presence, cousin Vaughn and my other uncle Bubba... That tradition is one that was so familar and so always a part of every Christmas experience that like most things you do unconsciously you end up taking for granted as to how much those moments meant to you... Just thinking about those times allows me to hear those voices so clearly and smell the heavenly aroma of turkey and dressing, football game on the television, sitting out on the balcony, "fixing" a plate of food, my official job as potato salad taste tester, delicious bread pudding with the delicious sauce that my grandmother always made so good.. I got her recipe so I know how to make it but it ain't the same as when she used to make it all the time... Christmas past is no longer... As I said, this time the tradition included a detour... No longer traveling to Adams near Western but instead to the cemetery on Washington Blvd. where my grandmother was put to rest... I spent time with her spirit though I know she's all around me and always there looking down... I like to make sure she knows she's always in my thoughts as I whispered a Merry Christmas to her, brushed off the headstone and continued my day, driving off while listening to some Donny Hathaway and other old soul classics that reminded me of years gone by...

To be missed and missing..

I'm home from watching the latest Will Smith movie.. I already knew the story so basically I just wanted to "watch." I was hoping for a feel good type of story.. I can't really say it was that.. Mostly it just had me feeling and recognizing how close we all are to being out there on the street with no place to stay... The old cliche' "a paycheck away from homelessness" or something to that affect.. I dont know... Plus, I had recently made trips to downtown LA and took pictures of life down there in areas where homelessness is rampant... The lines for shelters are scary.. People lined up in droves, wrapped around several blocks.. scary... So, I couldn't feel completely good about the movie.. I enjoyed Will Smith's kid who was too cute but I waited basically for the happy ending so I could walk out of the movie feeling good.. I didn't really get it but on my way back to my car as I exited the theatre and walked through the mall, dodging a sea of white faces, some trying to bump into me and others just giving me mean looks, a tall brotha walking with his fine sistah said hello as if we knew each other and it felt good. There was my feel good ending... Dude looked like he belonged to some professional basketball team and he made me proud for that couple seconds of greeting and wishing each other well. No disrespect to anybody else but when I get a warm greeting by a black person it feels damn good...

Anyway, I did a little midnight car washing because my car was dirty and I want to wake up to a clean car tomorrow on Christmas Eve. Washing my car gives me time to think though the subject on my mind had been there for a couple days now as I found myself missing someone; an old friend... A friend who I spent Christmas with last year and really enjoyed her company. I sent her an email the other day wishing her well and letting her know that I hope she's having a great holiday season. Her response was a thank you but I could tell her heart probably wasn't in it.. You know how you can feel a certain coldness to words.. Her thank you felt real chilly...lol.. It doesn't hurt because I understand but I had to try and say hello to her because as I said, I miss her and her friendship.. We shared a lot of great walks and talks together. I took her to her first Prince concert. She's a great lady doing great things, I hope.. We crossed the line though we disagree on that perceived line... She wanted more than I did... More than friendship.. I just couldn't see us as more... We shared hugs, we shared a certain closeness and came close to that ultimate closeness, if you will but we didn't... A mistake on both of our parts but I like to think that as adults you can handle things like that. Her perceived line was crossed and she read too much into things I had written during that time which caused feelings to be hurt... She was done with me and still is.... but nevertheless, I miss her and wish her well... I dont seek forgiveness, though.. but I do apologize for the uncomfortable-ness I may have placed inside her heart... In my opinion, real true friendship should never end unless there's a real good reason... I can't recollect any good reason.. All I remember are the great times... take care old friend... :-)

Life is as it should...

Once upon a time I was with a woman who I loved in a way that was bigger than love itself.. She was my everything and all the cliches' wrapped up into one... I felt like I truly had a woman and I actually belonged to someone.. I'd overheard her saying to someone "that's my man!" and she said it with pride and I loved her even more for that... Then in the end, she forgot.. She took love for granted.. She allowed her life and others around her to flip the script, so to speak.. She got comfortable in taking me for granted and laughing at the fact that she could break my heart... Years later she's asking questions which are disguised... She's feeling me out for the possibility of getting back together but how can I when I remember the end... How can I when I remember being treated like shit? I remember being put in the back of all her decisions... The girls came first, then "me time," then trips somewhere else so she could getaway.. Then she'd come back and brag about being away yet I did nothing to crowd her space... She accused me of not being there for her and when she gave me that final blow of kicking me to the curb as I drove her to work in the early morning, she smiled at the fact that she left me sitting in the car in tears... It made her proud of herself... How do you return to that sort of thing? How do you repair enough trust to go back? Forgiveness only provides enough space for the makings of a possible friendship... Phone calls and concern for well being.. It's hard to forget when you're treated like shit... That odor in your soul that's left behind dont go away so easily... nah mean? I can forgive but I can't forget... Then I think about life as it is now and all the growth I've experienced in just being a man over the years.. It feels good, it feels great... A brotha on the move, thinking about his future, setting things up so he can enjoy perhaps an early retirement from the 9 to 5 one day... I'm on the verge of doing as I like to say "dreamstyle" things... A project in the works that I can't reveal but it's such a dream come true. Something I can be extremely proud of and say "I did it all by myself!" And then I can show my mother and let her enjoy it too, whenever she chooses... The only real thing I miss right now is my grandmother, Alzata Moorings but I bet she's proud too.. And one day soon, another dream will come true... My epic story.. Until Again.. released in a big way thanks to all the love and very special help that holds me up, keeps me lifted, and inspired...Thanks to Tee... I'm on a humble mission to simply live a good life.... no BS... no time wasting drama... no foolishness... I just wanna live a good life with passion and appreciation... From the heart... From the soul... I bleed with sincerity and respect...Dreamstyle..

Missing the road..

Tomorrow my road will lead back to familiar territory aka the J-O-B... It's always good to get back to work but I will definitely miss the road. I find myself trying to think and remember where I was this time last week. Every moment, every minute was all about the journey and planning everything at the spur of the moment. I had more fun than I ever did before on my trips or at least in a very long time. There were two other times which came close to being just as special and that was the very first trip I took about eight years ago right after my father passed away and then the trip I took with the special lady in my life at the time. That three week period it felt like we'd shared the kind of experiences that most couples take about ten years to experience. On this journey that I just returned from, felt like a lifetime of experiences too. I tried to squeeze in as much as I could and yet there was still a lot I wanted to do. And I definitely wish I could've stayed in Atlanta another week because that was too fun.

Looking back on my trip, the funniest moments probably had to do with certain hotels that I stayed at... It was hit and miss with those places but for the most part I always found some pretty good places. However, there were three exceptions. Three, dirty-funky-hotels that had me afraid to even touch the floor without wearing shoes.. The first was the Executive Inn in Mt. Pleasant, Texas. That place was nasty, the so-called highspeed wireless had no speed. The lady at the front desk was sexy and friendly, trying to show all sorts of cleavage but a pretty smile with curves can't entice me to spend the night in filth. Then there was the Best Western in Natchitoches, Louisiana. This was the place where I was like, there's no way I'm taking of my shoes or even placing my luggage on the floor. It was dirty, smelled very strange, and just felt unsafe to spend the night in without coming down with some kind of illness the next day... The last place that fit in the category of dirty-funky-hotels was the Best Western in Pecos, Texas. This place tripped me out. It looked nice from the outside and the people at the front desk were very friendly. Then when I got to my room I was happy because I had to use the bathroom really bad. After I did that, I took a deep breath, felt relieved and then happened to look up at the ceiling. I was like, what the hell? The celing was covered with about 30 or 40 flies... I couldn't believe those were flies at first so I threw a towel at them and they started flying around the room before returning to the ceiling... Yikes... That was a place I didn't need to be.

Now for the best hotels? Comfort Inn in Mt. Pleasant, Natchitoches and Atlanta(Union City). All three of those places made me feel at home and very at ease with highspeed internet that actually worked.. I miss all those experiences both good and bad.. That's what makes the road interesting and unpredictable... Great time...

Inspiration and Thanks..

  

Very kind words always give me inspiration... I have to send special thanks out to some ladies that recently emailed me. They thanked me for my novel "My Life Is All I Have" and my novella featured in the new anthology called "Love Is Never Painless." I wanna share some of what they said. I'm forever grateful for the kind words and inspiration...

---------------------------------

I used to really avoid black novels because I always thought they were
all about glorifying a ghettofabulous lifestyle (I don't listen to
hip-hop, either) and deep tragedy...until I started reading a few, and
not too bad, but I'm still reserving the right to be very selective.
Then I read YOUR book: gramatically astute (majorly important to me),
intelligent, insightful, and very realistic. Leesha was a personally
relatable character for me.

Thank you so much for the privilege of reading..keep up
the good work, and stand proud but stay humble!

--Sophisticated Sparkle

-----------------------------------------

Mr. Rivers,

I wanted to let you know I just finished "My Life Is All I Have"
and it was wonderful!!! I can see all the events as they unfold. I am a
Teacher of middle school kids and I see so many Leesha's at my school, I
want to let them all read the book. I think it would be nice to see
what happened to Scottie and if he and Leesah's path will ever cross
again. Again I enjoyed reading your book.

--Kattrina

------------------------------------


Hello V. Anthony Rivers,

I just finished the tri-book Love Is Never Painless written by you, Zane and Eileen M. Johnson I just wanted to tell you I really enjoyed Love is 2 Blame. I am a avid reader and a hopeless romantic. I really enjoyed the idea of one man believing in love and realizing love before it became too late. I just wanted to compliment you on a well written and wonderful story. It makes believe there is hope out there for everyone. When one door is closed another will open for you. Thank You and I look forward to your next project. All the best in your future.

K. Thornton.

-------------------------------------------

Hello

I just read your story in the book Love is never painless and it's
absolutely beautiful, only one problem WHERE ARE THE MEN THAT
EXPRESSES THEIR FEELINGS LIKE THIS LOL!!!!! I so wish I could find a man
that is a fourth like Malcolm ( maybe one day I will).
I loved the way you made me feel as if all the feelings Malcolm was
going through I could relate too, I eagerly anticipate reading more from
you

--Shanell

Going back to Cali....Cali..

As I make my way back to the land of earthquakes, fires, speechless eyecandy, glitz, glitter and wild times at Magic Johnson's Starbucks, I look back on this journey with bittersweet fondness... I've seen A LOT in every single mile... It's been incredible. I've shared some images in the blog but I've got about 200 plus other shots that I haven't shared but plan to put together in a really cool book that documents this time.

A few standout moments to mention of course are my time spent in Atlanta with my sisterfriend Kim and her family. That was an awesome time. I never felt so special and at the same time was never able to appreciate and checkout Atlanta like I did this time. I must say I can understand why folks love it so much.

New Orleans was mindblowing to me. I still love the town and pray that the help that's needed is directed toward the less fortunate rather than solely on the tourists spots. Make the whole city beautiful and not just the areas that get on camera.

Daingerfield, Texas.. Had a great time visiting family. A good visit with cousin Maggie and Big Mama. It's a sad situation back there with the young men carrying no respect and no direction on their backs like they think it's the best thing since chocolate candy. What they do or perhaps dont do has really brought down what once was not only a beautiful area but also a very special place for the Rivers family from all parts of the US to come and visit loved ones, past and present... It used to be 136 acres of beautiful land, horses, cows, well kept homes, and a very historical family cemetery. Now it's beer bottles stacked on top of each other, pitbulls barking, deteriorating homes, land no longer owned by the family, and so much more that make you shake your head and wonder what happened.

Mt. Pleasant... beautiful used-to-be small town and the place where my father and grandmother are buried. I enjoyed my stay to the fullest there. Still the best hotlinks and chicken-fried steak you can find anywhere. This place is full of memories for me that I could fill up ten books with...

I've got to give special thanks to a very tall creole gentleman that approached me in the backwoods of Louisiana near the Cane River. Mr. Chevalier came up to me, introduced himself and shook my hand really strong. He was impressed that I'd driven so far but was proud to hear me say how much I loved where he came from and my frequent visits there. He said to me "it's very easy to fall in love with this place..." It truly is and the tradition and respect that this area has for not only the living but the departed souls is something that everyone should pay attention to and learn from. You can see the love on everyone's faces and the easy smile they give you the moment they see you. This backwoods area is where the St. Augustine church is and I smile at the memory of seeing a couple people come to the parking lot of this church to pick up all the pecans that had blown off the trees after some very powerful winds came through. Actually, those winds felt really good as I sat in my car eating some delicious meat pies and drinking grape soda.. *smile*

This has been quite a journey.. I could fill at least two books with stories about it..*smile* It's not over yet but I couldn't resist writing down some thoughts about it as I begin the long trek back to Cali. It's been incredible but as one journey comes to an end, another one must begin... Gotta find Love so that she can accompany me on next years long journey.. For now, time to hit the road...

New Orleans (November 2006)

I was blown away by what I saw in New Orleans... Parts of the city is like a war zone and the French Quarter aint the same but they seem to be trying to rebuild it. The freeways are being rebuilt. Life still aint the same but I still love that city. Can never get enough of it...

Chillin in The A

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Journey continues..more to take in for the soul... It's been fabulous..

11-8-06 Collage

  

A Day In The Country

This is what I saw today... The country air is clean and life is slow, simple, and complicated too because the young folks got issues out here! lol.. Despite the beauty of what you see in the pictures above, there's a lot of disappointment and ignorance especially amongst the young black men. History is forgotten and pride only gets a shoulder shrug. It's been quite a trip.. enjoy the visuals.. It was beautiful taking all this in.. East Texas, aka Mt. Pleasant, Daingerfield, Omaha, and Pittsburg, Texas...

Road still smilin..

  

The road was still smilin on me today.. Seemed like there was a parade going on with all the NASCAR trucks riding down the highway in convoys. Each truck was very colorful so every few minutes I had something colorful to watch. Then came this moving truck barreling down on me and that began a little tit for tat racing between me and him... I knew I could pretty much leave that big rig behind but from experience, I learned that certain towns in Texas you gotta be leery of when it comes to the Texas Rangers being nearby... My prediction was right on time as me and the big rig were approaching Sweetwater. That's when you begin to see a lot of rangers. I slowed down and the big rig got a little excited so he sped up real fast and went around me. Seconds later there was a ranger driving in the opposite direction and I saw his head look in the direction of the truck. He turned around and zoomed on by. I got off the highway for a second just to make sure he didn't know we both were speeding. I bought a little snack and then got back on the road. That moving truck was pulled over and receiving a nice ticket. I was careful from that point on because Abilene, Texas is the same way. Texas Rangers driving up and down the highway constantly...

I didn't do much picture taking today but tomorrow I will finally be in the heart of east Texas so stay tuned for some amazing reflections and images of life in the country... This is where Mother Nature is at her finest.. *smile*

Day two..making my way..

  

I'm making my way to greener pastures and lovin every blessed minute/mile of it.. Texas is a huge state and I'm only half way in it.. Earlier today I passed through a town called Truth Or Consequences. Yes indeed that's the name of the town located in New Mexico. I'm still bumpin some Snoop Dogg radio making my trip a whole lot of fun.. I'm new to all this technology stuff so I'm like an innocent kid in this candy store lovin the fact that all these hotels and even roadside tourist information centers have the wireless hook up so I can jump online anytime.. And of course as an observer of life, my cup runneth over.. As soon as you hit El Paso some serious cow shit hits your nostrils in a big way and you know you're in Texas..lol.. BUT.. I love that smell because it reminds me of summertime on the farm with my grandfather back in the day.. And over the years I've learned big time that there's BIG money where that smell originates.. As you ride on Interstate 10 approaching El Paso you see thousands of cows..literally.. All of them producing milk that ends up in our local grocery stores..

Now I look forward to getting past all these dry land areas of Texas and reaching the promised land of east Texas.. Hopefully I'll see more curves as well once I hit Dallas and make my way further into what will make this trip it's most rejuvenating.. Curves..yes..lol.. Umm.. the kind that have smiles attached and beautiful voices.. There's been a drought when it comes to that good stuff during the first part of this journey but nevertheless, this has been fun and its just beginning. *smile*

On some Willie Nelson Ish...

  

As Big Willie Nelson would sing.."On the road again!" that's exactly what I'm doin as we speak and it feels really good.. This is a return to what I used to do every year around this time.. Take a nice long journey to whatever.. have some incredible times, speeding down the highway, flossing everywhere, eating delicious food, capturing life images, stirring up memories; new and old, inspiring smiles along the way and listening to interesting voices...

Whew..leaving LA was like being in an airplane, taxing to the runway but taking forever to get there! Traffic was everywhere and at a snails pace but I was blessed with a few moments which allowed me to fill my heart with a ton of patience..

First blessing was a quick visit from my mother who brought over a care package and some ice for my ice chest. She blessed me with a hug and the usual motherly worries that I dont take for granted as long as she doesn't drive herself crazy with it... I checked in so she knows I'm doin fine.. :-) Next blessing came when I visited my father's childhood friend; Vernice Lee. They grew up together in Mt. Pleasant, Texas which is definitely a major stop on this journey. I made his day by stopping by there. Then the last necessary stop to make this trip special was going by the cemetery where my grandmother(Alzata Moorings)is buried. I'm blessed to have had two incredible grandmothers who thought the world of me. This trip begins with that visit and once I get to east Texas I'll stop by to visit the grave of my grandmother on my father's side(Senora Rivers).

This is day one of what should be quite a journey.. I'm on some Willie Nelson ish and cant wait for tomorrow to come so I can continue.. Another cool thing I enjoyed today was that my recent purchase of an XM Satelite radio proved to be a good one.. They had the Snoop Dogg, Welcome 2 Da Church Marathon going on! No matter where I travel, I'm still westcoast! *smile* Snoop knows how to bring it musically playing everything from his latest stuff to some very old oldschool 70's joints... That was a beautiful thang! Blessings.. :-)