Yo..

  

Hellooooo to all my millions of friends out there who visit this blog and especially the four or five that do it on the regular...lol.. And even a wink and a smile to those one or two that peek in with the mindset of "I wonder what HE is doing these days.." :-) I've been on a semi-hiatus from the blog. The motivation for many things has been low. The writing has come with struggle though in my mind I still flow all the time... I've been lazy with putting fingers to keys. That motivation hasn't been there.. Life has been a trip, especially in this month with all the death anniversaries and now the loss of my last grandparent. It's been one of those times when I wish I could reach back and bring yesteryear forward so I could enjoy it all over again... We've got memories but ain't nothin like the real thing, as the song goes... Grasping memories... Maybe that's why I been listening to the classic soul station on the itunes radio so much. Actually, that's been a lot of fun because I'm rediscovering songs that mean't a lot to me and hearing stuff I never heard before because I was into something else..

In a couple weeks I will begin an old tradition that started when my father passed away.. Hitting the road and going on a journey that's purely motivated and inspired by the journey itself. I'll be headed south with one of my main stops being east Texas to visit family, living and deceased. Flowers for my father, grandmother and grandfather's grave. Visiting family and listening to familiar stories all over again. Checking out beautiful scenery and eating some mouth watering food... Hotlinks in Mt. Pleasant, Tx and meatpies in Natchitoches, La. The miles will take me far and the inspiration will stay with me forever once I return. Last year I didn't go anywhere and it left me feeling like something was missing. I vowed I would make my return to the road and document the journey along the way.. Perhaps it'll even get me back to blogging more frequently. I'm sure it will. Ain't nothing like being on the road. It's something that even my father would do on the regular. I may have inherited the roadwarrior spirit from him, traveling from town to town and witnessing the unknown, unexpected each step of the way. But of course I do it in my own style and that will be reflected no doubt.. *smile* Thanks to this blessing of photography I can capture and create. It's a gift that has kept me creative during times when I didn't feel like writing lately. Photography inspires you to look at everything in different ways. Even if your desire is to photograph models ie. women, you look deeper, you search for other ways to find and express the beauty from within. And my digital paintbrush/camera is about to be blessed not only with scenic beauty but I'm sure I'll pass a few incredible ladies along the way.

My last journey was beautiful.. It was a healing time. Healing of the heart because prior to that I was in love and that was taken away. I traveled with that love and we did some amazing things when we journey'd together. Those memories I carry with pride but they're- memories. The journey since then has been better, in a way...different though nothing replaces love per se. Ahh... but I found new discoveries, new cool spots, new smiles, new voices... Time will tell what this journey will bring... The highlight will definitely be seeing my good sisterfriend Kim in Atlanta and possibly a visit also in Atlanta with my other sisterfriend Jamise. That will be wonderful... The most magical time will be seeing my cousin Maggie.. A real true earth angel in Daingerfield, Tx...

In the meantime I want to give a special shoutout to a real cool brotha on the eastcoast, Slish. I visit his blog constantly and always enjoy it. If our paths should ever cross in person it'll be a great moment for sure and I'll have to buy him a sassparilla to celebrate! lol.. Much respect and appreciation for Mr. Slish out there representin in the best kind of way... Thanks to anyone and everyone reading this here.. *smile* Peace...

Ahhh... and one more thing I almost forgot.. Got a new book coming out.. Actually, it's an anthology put together by Zane that has been in the works for quite a few years now. The wait will be worth it in my mind because the story written definitely expresses how a man is capable of loving a woman and how that man's heart bleeds when all that he gave is tossed away... It's a good story. One of three short novellas in the collection called "Love Is Never Painless." Due out in mid November...

Rest In Peace

  

Alzata Moorings, my beautiful grandmother leaves this earth on October 20th. She's at peace now. No more pain... Looking down with love..

Weekend Down..

  

The adversary of life can sometimes knock you back down just as you think you've made strides to get to a certain point... That's when the inner strength must kick in and all those things that one must do to remember dreams, goals, and all things that stimulate your inner-self to say, "it aint over yet. You gotta do it! Keep on keepin on!" and all the other cliche's that have been handed down through time...

Last week was an interesting one. It was a time when memories collapsed upon me like a ten gallon water tank above my head. Not that it was bad and not that it was especially good but as my journey continues, last week was important. Sad anniversaries reminded me of what we take for granted most times...LIFE. Eight years ago my father passed away on October 3rd. The month also marks the fifth year anniversary of his mother aka my grandmother's passing and the one year passing of my cousin Natalie who left this earth a year ago, last week. And then there was something that happened to me a year ago on the night after attending Natalie's funeral that will forever leave a powerful mark in my personal journey. Not a born again experience or nothing like that but a life experience.. a new perspective...lucky to be here...still...today, experience.. I went through this moment in my life with a friend of mine who unfortunately after almost a year of silence I would have to assume is no longer a friend. That's sad because she was special and a blessing to know but folks have their own agendas, reasons, and other stuff that make them stick around or choose to leave... Thus, life continues on and it's been good but again, moments happen like an adversary with a strong hand keeping you from taking the step you wanted to take. This weekend was a little bit rough... I stayed home fighting a bad cold that knocked me for a loop and relied on infomation from my mother about my grandmother(Alzata) being evaluated by hospice. I know too well about this stage as I went through it with my grandmother on my father's side(Senora). With me being the only grandson of Senora and my father having passed away before her, I had the responsibility to make all decisions. That was a very rough time. This time all I can do is pray for my grandmother's comfort as the family on my mother's side attempts to adjust and accept what's inevitable. My mother is blessed to have a sister and three brothers to help her with all decisions. I hope they all recognize this and come together... Life aint always fun but it's always headed somewhere....

Flower

  

A flower blooms in the middle of men...

I was at the Silver Dollar Classic football game in Los Angeles on Saturday. It was a cool event. Alcorn State versus Morehouse. They brought some black college football to the westcoast and that's a good thing. Unfortunately there wasn't very many folks in attendance but maybe next year. Personally I had fun. I even captured a few cool shots with the camera like a shot of Denzel Washington on the sidelines and even a good picture of Snoop Dogg... BUT... nothing compares to taking shots like above. A beautiful lady looking incredible though at the same time she appeared lost amongst all the men. For me, no amount of football being played could ever keep me from checking her out.. whew.. I can catch a football game any day, but capturing a moment like this? Blessing..

Catch A Moment

  

The best part of photography is catching a moment... I caught this moment as this fella was standing in anticipation of a clear path of water that he could glide on.

Eyes All Mine

  

Lone souls fill the city streets with heads down, walking, thinking, appearing oblivious to their surroundings yet there's no doubt each one sees the other. For some reason there's this perception that if we dont connect we're better off and thus, more times than not you see folks with their heads down, tracing the path of the sidewalk, on their way to wherever they're going. And I say to this, lift each other up with a hello and maybe a smile 'cause nine times out of ten you will leave that moment wanting to say thanks because it came exactly when you needed it.

Headline-Diversity

  

Reading about diversity today as reported by the newspaper. The only kind of diversity that sticks out in my mind is the haves versus the have nots. I work in Pasadena but live near Figueroa and Century. I'm a "have" though I work hard for the little that I got. I'm surrounded by "have nots." When I drive home, I take the harbor freeway and get off on Century. I noticed that they got what looks like twenty foot walls on the side of the freeway, designed to muffle the sound of all the traffic zooming by but if you ask me, I say it's designed to keep folks from seeing poverty. Them walls seem to disappear once you get out of South Central. That's diversity.

When I'm coming home, I make a right turn on my street and feel good that I've got a home to come to. But then I look down the street and see young ladies on the corner looking half naked and desperate. I was at a stoplight today and a young woman walked across the street holding her pants up with one hand and carrying a purse that looked like it came out the trashcan, in her other hand. Her clothes were dirty. Her skin looked like she hadn't bathed in months; maybe even a year. Makes you wonder sometimes. I look in the direction from which this female came from and I see a church with it's doors closed but I can't talk because I wouldn't let this lady in my house either. I ain't proud of those feelings but they right there in whatever part of my soul that causes me to judge everyone and everything I see like these local liquor store owners that ease up when they see I look neither hungry, homeless, or threatening.

So, everyday on my lunch break I walk over to the park. I sit and read my newspaper. I might have a little snack now and then but mostly I like to relax and catch up with the news. Ain't nothing new that I read about but I just like to keep current. Ain't no park in my area for miles and whenever I do drive over to the nearest one, I gotta keep track of the time 'cause things change when night time comes. Those have not's begin to take and like my mama once told me, I ain't always in my right mind so I will try to defend myself and make it a long day for anybody trying to take what belongs to me. The world that I read about in the newspaper is just a soundbite to reality. Counting blessings go hand in hand with counting how many lives were lost over the course of a weekend.

Diversity... Children smiling behind a backdrop of crime, grafitti, drugs, and the devastation of being the less fortunate. Ten mintues away from where I live you see this image on a day to day. I often wonder why there's so many police officers patrolling a small project housing area. Is it truly to protect and serve or to make sure nobody leaves. Twenty minutes away is Beverly Hills. You dont see police that often. As you walk around you can listen to the breeze. People are smiling. Some might even say hello and wish you a pleasant day. You can fill up your car at the gas station without being approached by a bunch of people that want to pump your gas or wash your windows. You can stand back an relax as the gas fills your tank without someone offering to sell you CD's and DVD's. I love my home and I even love my neighborhood but diversity to me is all about the differences you find based on where you live. I see it all everyday as I make my commute from South Central LA to Pasadena. LA ain't really growing. It's just filling up and getting crowded. The noise level be the only true thing that grows. People talking louder everywhere you go. People shouting into cellphones. Everybody gotta have music playing. Nobody appreciates a good dose of silence. That's why I come to the park on my lunch break. I welcome the night time at home though my heart goes out every once in a while when I hear a distant gunshot or some life altering foolishness that goes on in the streets. Those of us that got homes in this area can lock our doors, turn up the television and block it all out. I'm one of the "have's" so I'm guilty of avoiding what's outside my door. I haven't built a wall up but I do from time to time, look away... Then I read the newspaper about diversity and wonder what are they really celebrating because once they recognize who you are, you are then directed towards where they believe you should be... Back to work...

Shake what?

  

It dont matter who's looking, I'ma get my party on! Shake my ass like a skinny girl. Twirl around like my homegirls wish they could do. I've got the sun shining all over me like God put the spotlight on a sistah, himself. Got my tight jeans on soaking it all up and everybody sitting around trying to figure out where I get the nerve to do what I do. They all know they wanna join me. Every other face got a smile. They watching me and lovin it. Lovin the way all of me jiggles and lovin it when I wiggle. They dont want none of this 'cause they can't handle it. But they all wish they could... handle it... *smile*

Made A Bluesman's Day

  

Saturday was a good day once I shook off the morning laziness I was feeling after enjoying my sleep a little too much. I woke up later than I wanted to simply because I stayed up until about 7:30am. I laugh at myself because I got caught up in watching the movie version of Fat Albert. (LOL!) Yeah, that's funny but it's cool... I never saw it before when it first came out. I couldn't see myself going to a movie theatre to watch it and after that I pretty much forgot the movie existed. I have to admit that what also kept me glued to the television was the fact that that sexy actress whose name escapes me now was in it. I think she's puerto rican. I remember seeing her in Spike Lee's movie, She Hate Me. whew... beautiful...

But anyway, back to Saturday... I challenged myself to go out and take some incredible pictures because my good friend Kim sent me pictures from her day spent hanging out in Piedmont Park in Atlanta, Georgia. I figured I'd see what I could do hanging out somewhere so I could send her some cool shots. I hope to convince her to work on a collection to put together in book form showing images, people, neighborhoods, etc etc that represent where she is(Atlanta) and where I am(LA). The book may take on a different theme being that I like to travel and especially love photographing the life and mystery that I often find when I'm in the south.

Speaking of the south, today as I was hanging out in Santa Monica trying to capture some incredible images to send to Kim, I heard some blues guitar and a haunting voice singing on the beach. I looked and found this bluesman in the picture above sitting leaned up against a bathroom wall. I listened to him for a little bit before taking a few pictures of him. Then I approached him so I could get a closer listen and to maybe talk for a bit. I smiled as I walked up. He'd seen me taking pictures of him. He bragged about his skills.

"Check this out here! This aint no amplification. This ain't no tape recorder and ain't no electricity anywhere near me! This is some real playing and some real sang'n!" He said.

"Yes, sir..." I threw some money in his case.

"Appreciate it."

Then I asked him a question that seemed to put him in a very happy state of mind. It was like I'd hit a magical switch that touched his heart.

"Why you not playing in Memphis or in Clarksdale, Mississippi? You sounding real authentic like you belong where this kind of music was born at."

"Ha! You know the blues then, huh? Shoot, life bring me here some kind of way. I been on the streets for years but at least me coming down here by the beach I always got a way to make a few dollars and keep myself clean. They got all them little showers around here which come in handy."

"I hear you..."

"Yes, sir but you know, I try to be what you call, discreet about it. I mean, these hotels so close by and all. These visitors trying to see bikini girls. They dont wanna look out they window at some skinny black man's behind tryna run up under some water! Ahhh ha haa... You know what I'm sayun? Shoot..."

I laughed and enjoyed the spirit of this bluesman. Seemed like he needed someone to stop by and greet him in a friendly way. He played his music and some people would drop money here and there but nobody said hello or stopped to talk with him. He thanked me with pride before I walked away and smiled for as long as we made eye contact. The way he played he really should be in Mississippi playing the blues and being treated like a king because his voice sounded like it was coming from a radio. It was nice to put a smile on his face...

Yo!

  

Yo! First it was Halle searching every corner of every local bookstore just to get a glimpse of my book and now we have the most incredible musician/performer on the planet taking a break and losing himself inside the pages of my masterpiece.... My Life Is All I Have. Prince can't get enough of the unconditional love found inside the pages of this incredible read...

Ummm...uhhh..what time is it! lol... DISCLAIMER TIME... In a perfect, fabulous, dreamed about world this image above would be true. Nah, Prince ain't holding my book(though he should) but it just goes to show you, you can't always believe what your eyes may see. What's below the surface? Behind the curtain? Behind those eyes? Underneath that skin? And in the case of the picture above, Prince is actually holding a Hawaii travel guide... *smile* Ha ha!

September Weekend

  

Just like the picture above of the Bird Soldiers almost standing at perfect attention, this was almost a perfect weekend. Actually, any weekend where there's great experiences, memorable moments, cool conversations and as my good friend Jody would say, "rainbows passing by" you know it's been a good one. Perfection might be if I were to catch one of those rainbows and spend good quality time. Jody always tells me to catch one but none of the moments were right for me to do that. Rainbows represent the ladies for those that might not catch what I'm saying.. *smile*

Anyway, this weekend was cool and it was slightly sad... I got stood up by my "ex." Ha! Actually, that falls under the cool category because despite it being her idea to hook up and hangout, I knew she wouldn't follow through-- like always. Life goes on and so it did in a more special way. Spent time visiting my grandmother who is in a rest home right now. She looked strong. She looked good though it's a tough one getting used to her being there rather than being active at home like she used to be.

As I was visiting my grandmother, there were also two other women in the room with her. Each room has three beds separated by curtains. My grandmother is in the middle bed. To the left of her is a white woman, very frail and sleeps all the time. Every once in a while she mumbles something. As I stood there, my mother who was also visiting and my grandmother sort of brushed off what the white woman was saying. "She does that all the time; it's nothing," my mother said as my grandmother agreed. Thing about it, to me when an elderly person who is pretty much at the end of her life mumbles something, it's never "nothing." I listened to her and could sense that somewhere in her mind, this white woman's life was passing before her. She was saying words that sounded as if she were having a conversation with a loved one; possibly her husband. This lady actually looked like she was once a very beautiful woman perhaps when she was young but now she was curled up and so frail.

To the right of my grandmother was another very frail woman with salt and pepper hair and a tube in her nose. She was also asleep the whole time. She was a black woman with a beautiful face despite her elderly appearance. They said she had just been brought into the rest home. She was also lying in bed curled up. She reminded me of my grandmother on my father's side. As I stood there, moments later a stunning young woman walked into the room. She placed her hand on the frail black woman's shoulder to see if she'd wake up but she didn't. I could tell that this young woman was probably the grand daughter. She looked at me, smiled and said hello. And then I witnessed something that I so badly wanted to capture with my camera but all I could think was that I'd only be intruding on a very precious moment. The young woman leaned over and placed her face against her grandmother's and closed her eyes. It was like she was connecting with her through spirit. It was really a touching moment and then I turned away. After a couple minutes I looked again and noticed the young woman had left.

After some good time spent with my grandmother I hit the streets and had a blast. Took some pictures, met up with some friends and even met someone new; a young lady named Nadia. That's where the cool conversation of the weekend comes in. Nadia was funny, very cheerful, sexy, very touchy/feely, and a beautiful happy spirit. She's originally from Long Island and hasn't been in LA very long; maybe a month or two. She seems like she has a lot to learn and I pray she gains wisdom fast. I loved her accent and the way she kept putting the word "mad" practically before every word... *smile* Maybe not every word but she said it a lot! mad-this...mad that....yo! I was lovin it. She scooted up close and gave me a hug. She kept touching my hands and forgetting that she asked me some of the same questions already. "Uh-oh, we got mad chemistry, yo.." she said to me as I gripped her hand. "I like you. I hope I'm not talkin too much. Am I messin up your flow?" she said as she looked around thinking I might be looking at other women. "Nah..." I said. we parted ways after she gave me her phone number and kept repeating as her voice faded away "you gonna call me, right? Yo...come on..call me...okay?" She was mad cool.. *smile*

It was hot in the valley where I live so I chilled for a while in Venice near the beach. I walked along the canals. Yeah, there's a neighborhood with canals for streets and everybody got little boats if they wanna cruise around. Ducks are all over the place quacking like crazy but sounding like they're laughing. Everybody seems happy to live in this neighborhood so pretty much everyone says hello in passing. You usually find that out here in neighborhoods where people love to come home.I got a dose of some latin christian hip hop music on Venice Beach that was pretty good. It was a group called Sons Of God performing near the boardwalk. They basically sounded like Tupac with religious words. And every step of my weekend journey was filled with visions of those rainbows.. It ended with a nice semi-bigtime moment as a young lady said to me "oh my God, I know you! I'm like halfway finished with reading your book! It's very good! That book about that girl named Leesha? You wrote that, right?" I was like, whoa... my little minute of fame... Now its time to get back to reality and look forward to next weekend..

Mista Semi-Bigtime

  

I'm winking at Bloopty-Bloop with this one! lol.. It's the return of Mista Semi-Bigtime! Yeah, that's me... Giving a shoutout to myself as I'm featured in this new online magazine, written, produced, and directed by bestselling author, NOIRE who is making a huge splash in the literary world right now. I'm honored and blessed to be included in the first issue of her magazine which really looks good. I wish it were on the newstands just so I could hold a copy in my hands... If you're surfing the net be sure to check it out at www.NOIREMagazine.com Dont just checkout my interview but checkout the entire magazine.. It's real cool reading...

Weekend

  

As the police vans rolled in one by one across the Venice Boardwalk, the fella above with electric guitar in hand yelled out "Here they come! Homeland IN-security!" Then he hit us all with a barrage of electric sounds that spoke volumes to those passing by. Most would agree that this brotha needs to learn him some chords!!! His heart was in it and he posed real good...

That's how my weekend began and it's been a hot one in Southern Cali. The energy out here is a mixture of positive and negative. The heat brings out the worst in folks, especially those behind the wheel of an automobile. People honking for no reason or speeding to get around you-for no reason. Just people generally acting a fool.

I had a fabulous booksigning on Saturday at Zahras Books & Thangs located in LA on La Brea. I had a good time. Again feeling the heat. Sweating and greeting folks that came in the door. Most that came in already had my book or had seen it advertised around town and thought about getting it. Everybody promised to get it in the future, meaning that despite my fun-filled two hours chatting with the friendly customers and enjoying my visit with beautiful Trisha behind the counter and the beautiful owner Renee, I sold zero books! lol.. That's the hazards of booksignings.. Sometimes you do great and other times you do nothing at all but it can still be fun.

As always whenever I do a signing there's one person that comes in and takes up at least fifteen to thirty minutes of your time talking typically about a desire to write a book or questioning why black folks dont buy and/or support black product. I had one of those moments but I appreciated it and went with the flow. Killed some time and bonded with the brotha for a few minutes. He was there looking for some mystery books so I told him about a few that he promised to come back and buy along with my book.

Sunday, I went to the annual African American Marketplace festival. People were walking around with umbrellas or knocking each over trying to find some shade. It was funny. The vibe at the festival was really nice and positive. Great music filled the air. I heard over a loud speaker that Fantasia was moments away from performing onstage so I went over to the stage area. I took a look thinking I would hear some singing but instead it was a dance troupe of about eight little girls dressed in purple, doing their thang. It was cute. I enjoyed it. Then I got a request of a donation by some Dorsey Highschool cheerleaders. They looked like what I used to always term "future foxes" on their way to becoming serious heartbreakers. I donated some money and gave a poster card to them about my book since Dorsey High is featured in the story. My battery was low in the camera so I didn't bring it into the festival. I missed a lot of moments this weekend by not having the camera ready but just like that signing, you win some, ya lose some but you can always have a great time! :-)

After the festival I headed to my favorite Starbucks in the Ladera Center. You can always find several things there.. great gossip, beautiful ladies, cool cars and motorcycles... This time the air was filled with talk about a shooting that happened on Crenshaw Blvd. The fellas were all taken back by the lawlessness and disregard for life. One fella made an interesting comment that is also a sad reality... He said "one good thing about these dudes pulling the trigger lately is that they dont just spray a crowd with bullets. Now they walk right up on the muh-fukka and shoot him!" Everybody chimed in as another fella described what he heard about the shooting... "They said motorcycles was passing by so nobody really heard the shots eventhough it happened at 4:30 in broad daylight. Homeboy just walked up to the car and shot that dude six times, they said... Defintely on some retaliation tip. It dont matter how long it take. They'll wait to find you." After that, there was a little bit of silence for a moment and then a change of subject as a lovely lady walked inside Starbucks putting a smile back on everyone's face...

It's been a good weekend and now that the actual holiday is here, I'm planning to just chill, burn some food on the grill and relax.. It's still burning hot outside but eating good food makes it a lot more bearable... :-)

Idle and Joi-fully Wild...

  

Another interesting and fun-filled weekend was had.. I was definitely anticipating my Saturday because I knew I'd be checking out the creativity of Outkast under the direction of Bryan Barber who is equally creative... The direction was so cool with the photographic images seemingly coming to light. I loved that effect. I was also anticipating seeing Joi in concert on Saturday night once again at the temple bar in Santa Monica.

My Saturday was real cool and the anticipation was worth it...sort of... The movie was good.. I enjoyed it.. A lovely escape.. I like Terrence Howard in that role of being mean and shady.. he plays that kind of thing really well.. I always like seeing Ving Rhames representing himself as only he can do...strong.. And there's nothing more powerful than seeing Cicely Tyson on screen no matter how small the role. She always makes an impact... At times I had to remind myself that what I was watching was a musical because there were moments when the music came out of nowhere and caught me off guard because I was so into the story. At times I wish it were just a serious movie with a musical backdrop ala Ray with Jamie Foxx but I wasn't at all disappointed.. It was a great movie and definitely an escape from the usual. Not to mention, I have a love for going back in time so watching Andre 3000 and Big Boi aka Andre Benjamin and Antwon Patton doing there thing in an era gone by was real cool.. I wish I could go back to those times. As much as we're spoiled by technology and so called advances in life, etc etc., it just seems like actual LIFE and living meant so much more.... but anyways...

Saturday night it was time for Joi... Beautiful Joi... The Temple Bar is a cool place to hangout though I would love to see Joi in a larger concert hall type of place rather than a club. And I'd like to see her get down with some well rehearsed, confident playing musicians BUT...I digress... however, the musicians did struggle but Joi was the bomb! Her singing was very strong, she was in great spirits despite the trials of everyday life that she explained to the audience. Valet parking in Hollywood lost her car keys. There were wardrobe issues and other last minute craziness but she thanked a couple ladies in the crowd that she'd met recently who came to her rescue. She said they bonded as sisters and she was blessed because of it. She talked about relationships and her degree in psychology that she hopes to complete in three years. She was proud to say that one day she'll be known as Dr. Joi Gilliam and charge $300 per hour for folks to sit on her couch.. *smile* That was cool.. She also mentioned with pride about a song that's featured in Idlewild called Movin Cool. She wrote that! She had a lot of time to talk to the crowd due to more malfunctions but nevertheless she sang her heart out.. It was pretty cool. I enjoyed the night and ate some very delicious calamari... yummy.. I had the waitress laughing because I finished them so fast and had to order a second plate.. I was hungry!!

Sunday, I was expecting to rest up from Saturday. I had to work during the day on so my plan was to go straight home and get some much needed sleep. My plan didn't workout because as soon as nightfall hit, I was feeling that urge to go go go!! Joi was gonna be performing on the "black" side of town, which she said she couldn't wait to do. I figured that might be pretty interesting. Maybe her choice of songs and performance would be a little different. At the Temple Bar it was a crowd that was about 60% white but at this place in the hood called The Camelot it was about 98% black.

The Camelot was a nice place located not too far from Crenshaw Blvd. on 54th Street. I walked in and immediately loved the decor and the whole vibe.. Sort of an afrocentric thing going on. Looked like the perfect place for soft music, poetry, wine and dine. It wasn't really a restaurant and it wasn't even a bar. This was like a very large converted house turned into a rental hall or ballroom, I guess. They had an artist in the open air patio area showing off his work. Candles everywhere.. A couple of sofa's, different areas to sit inside and outside.. Really great place to mingle.. As it neared showtime I noticed a lot more very lovely ladies crowding in. The DJ was playing some real cool music that went from neosoul to old school. I sat down on one of the sofas with a lovely plate of soulfood just as the DJ began playing the Brother's Johnson track; Strawberry Letter. Ahhh... That felt like stepping back in time during that moment. The plate was super lovely because I had a couple biscuits, some heavenly gravy, fried chicken, greens, and sweet corn...Oh my!! I was about to really start enjoying myself... Lovely perfume from the ladies mixed with incense filled the air and sweet sounding voices could be heard along with the great music... I adjusted myself and began to sop up some of that gravy with the biscuit when all of a sudden those famous words came through loud and clear.."Good evening folks! This party is over! Women exit first and men follow!" My mouth was open but the biscuit hadn't reached my lips yet... It was the police and I mean A LOT OF POLICE standing together and giving us all looks like, you better not make any sudden moves. So, I dropped my biscuit in the gravy and stood slowly. One of the police told me to set my plate down.. Then I overheard others saying they planned to take all the equipment to the police station. One of the police officers took my plate and sat it down somewhere. I thought to myself, this is funny.. My soulfood got confiscated!! I felt bad for those musicians because their gear was about to be taken from them and it would be a long night and a hassle for them getting their stuff back. One policeman said they had been to The Camelot before and shut things down because they weren't allowed to have musical events there, especially concerts. That ran through my mind when I first came in because this place as I said was great for SOFT music, poetry, etc etc but Joi playing live is anything but soft. She likes to get loud and raw with her music from the opening number to the very end. She would've had that place rocking loud and made everybody in the neighborhood come outside. Somebody didn't do their research but it still made for an interesting night, capping off a fun weekend but damn them for taking my soulfood!! Aaaaaaarrrrgh!!

Outkast

  

This weekend I'm looking forward to checking out that Outkast movie, Idlewild. I'm a stickler for going-back-in-time stories anyway so I know I'm gonna love this one, especially being that its got those Outkast fellas in it. BUT...first things first.. The CD came out this week and I've been enjoying it. My favorite tracks are Train, Chronometrophobia, Hollywood Divorce, and a couple of other Big Boi dominated songs that I cant remember the titles of... I love Andre 3000 aka Andre Benjamin but I'm wishing he would return to rapping more. I dont mind the singing.. It's cool but in my un-called for opinion(wink), that brotha says a whole lot more when he raps! He can still maintain that artistic, creative, trailblazing role that he and his partner do by continuing to rap... But again, I dig some of the singing but I LOVE IT when he raps... Case in point.. the song Chronometrophobia... It's a super short song but lyrically it's the bomb... Peep these words as I think I got them right.. I listened a few times and then wrote them down..

Lord be havin mercy on my soul, I'm havin the impression that my life is gonna be a bowl... of cherries but it's very hard for me to cope... Got tired of being broke... This A-T-alien aint got no time to sit and mope. Made up my mind while y'all made up your beds... On a cold wooden floor is where I lay my head... Born in 1975 never thought I'd make it this far. Still battling in this racial war. Trying to find solutions to this situation I'm facing. Only thing that's free is my flow that y'all be chasing. Letting my niggas know before I go, I drop good knowledge like dropping books. Lets stop the crooks from robbing you of your brain and such. Using welfare as a crutch. I'm in it for good, you enter my hood, you wont be finding much. Hope that when I'm gone y'all remember this. What we stood for, fuck the fame and that glitz. It's beginning to look a lot like the ending. Got to be more careful, know what corners you be bending. Revelations getting inpatient now I'm dead. Remember what I said, I'm gone... Bow your heads...
Andre 3000

Despite that brotha not doing enough rappin on the CD, it's still a very creative and cool collection. I look forward to everything they do and hope that they do a lot more together. These two are unstoppable musically and they still got that fire... Special nod to my favorite female singer, Joi. She's singing on a couple of the tracks and is sounding especially sweet on my favorite called Train. I'll be checking her out in concert this weekend. Always the best live show you'll ever see. She's hot!

Sad Realities Of The Other Side Of Town

  

LA aka Los Angeles has such diversity in it's people population.. It blows my mind sometimes how many people are here filling up this town.. The crowds no matter where you go are interesting for lack of a better term at the moment.. There's always a potential for love amongst everyone or something negative poppin off too.

Sunday wasn't as visually stunning as Saturday but it was nevertheless poignant. How's that for a cool word? *smile* I visited two different areas on Sunday. Both are very familiar to me although one I hadn't really noticed before eventhough I'd traveled around this section of town many times. I'm speaking of Watts. I've been to this historic city but never had I passed by the Jordan Downs projects before. The picture above was taken there on Sunday. No disrespect to the residents of this project housing but the whole look and vibe of the area was very depressing; very sad. There were only two ways to get inside this place when it comes to driving your car unlike Nickerson Gardens, another project located five minutes away, where it seems a little more open. Looking at Jordan Downs I wondered how people must feel living there. I mean, there wasn't much joy, not even on the faces of kids who usually can find happiness anywhere. All the buildings were pink with bars everywhere. I can't imagine being excited about going home here but I do respect those that find a way to dig deep within themselves to persevere despite their circumstances. I'm pretty sure they're to be found here but on this day, everybody I saw either looked very angry or sad.. Makes me wish I had the power to do something that could make everybody happy... Jordan Downs seems worlds away from the so-called finer areas of Los Angeles and even my own suburb/valley living area.

Speaking of worlds away, I spent another lovely Sunday evening hanging out in front of Starbucks. Yep yep..and what do you see there? Lots and lots of women walking around.. Beautiful... all kinds..black, asian, latino, a growing population of ethiopian ladies, and many others.. Then you see fancy cars and SUV'S driving back and forth playing loud music from different eras. I mean, you might see a lowrider cruise by playing old Parliament, Heatwave, War, etc etc.. Or you might see another ride cruise by playing NWA, Eazy E, Ice Cube, The Game, etc etc... One guy drove by in a really old Cadillac playing some Curtis Mayfield and it sounded good. He turned heads just like he wanted to and inspired a few smiles and hollers. Then you have the parade of motorcycles riding by.. Every kind you can imagine making you feel like you're in the wild wild west. When they get off their bikes, everybody got that swagger as they make their way to the hanging out area. The best part is seeing all the comraderie between all the motorcycle clubs.. Everybody hugs everybody and shows concern and love no matter what your colors are or what the name on your vest is... I enjoyed seeing that.. I salute those clubs; Wanted Ridaz, Infinite Ridaz, Prospects, Red C Ridaz, A/O Ridaz and all the others whose names I can't recall filling the air with a positive vibe.

I sat next to a guy that was dressed in beige slacks, a black shirt, hair all greased back, sunglasses, and sandals. He talked major league mess and BS.. He complained about everything from the motorcycles to the music playing inside Starbucks. I figured he should've liked it considering he was 40 something and they were playing Aretha, Al Green, Teddy Pendergrass, The Dramatics, etc etc... Sounded good to me though no one was really paying attention to the music as much as they were checking out the scene. Then this fella spent about 15 minutes straight talking about stocks, bonds, realestate, and taking a trip to Nigeria. He mixed all those subjects together to a point where he made no sense at all.. Just sounded like he was bragging to me.. After a while I got tired and tuned him out until he finally pointed something out that we both could relate to, which was this gorgeous honey coated female approaching the door of Starbucks and smiling at us because we were staring so hard.. We both gave each other daps and nodded in agreement...

"Yep yep, that's why most of us here chillin at this particular Starbucks," He said.

"Exactly..." I told him.

And then on my way home, I thought about those kids I'd seen earlier on Sunday behind and surrounded by all those bars in Jordan Downs. I sent up a prayer for them with the hopes that whoever is teaching and raising them is supplying them with the inspiration to dream, hope, and strive for anything and everything that they want to see and do in this life... Know that there's a whole world out there waiting for them and that those bars are by no means a precursor to a direction they're destined for. It dont have to be that way at all...

Young Soldier

  

Leimert

  

Always some strong cultural identity and beauty happening in Leimert Park...

What year is it?

  

Everyday and especially on the weekends on Crenshaw Boulevard you're likely to find some young folks with a new old message dressed in an old familiar way. "Black Power!" They yell out to passing cars with raised fists in the air. For a time you might find two or three of them on any given day but now months later, there's a whole bunch of them taking what they do very seriously or at least portraying that.

One day a couple months ago I listened to a young brotha preaching as I ate hotdogs with a few other people at a hotdog stand on the boulevard. Everything he said made sense despite a few bits and pieces being exaggerated. I liked his passion and then I noticed a little bucket that he was carrying. It was the first time I'd seen these new militants, if you will asking for donations. I donated a little something and I've seen this young man several times after that marching down Crenshaw, fist in the air and carrying his bucket. I cant help but wonder what this will lead to for him and will he and his other comrades continue? Will they stay true? Are they prepared for anything and everything that might come with what they're doing? I've yet to hear any message from them saying what they hope to accomplish, so for right now they've just become yet another group of people known to walk and/or stand on corners on Crenshaw Blvd.

Jump ahead to today when I stopped by Leimert Park where they were having a Marcus Garvey Celebration Day. There were different speakers throughout the day and one of them was a young man named General Taco(brotha on the mic). That's what he called himself. He didn't say he was the leader of this group but I'm assuming that he's up there. The brotha spoke with extreme passion and even had a flow similar to Tupac when he's angry. I watched him. I felt like I'd stepped back in time with the way everyone was dressed and all the fists going up in the air. General Taco spouted out words of revenge and a call to arms. Familiar stuff. He spoke a lot about guns, "the pigs," and more guns, etc etc.. He ended each point that he made with what seemed like his adopted slogan, "click clack!" Only one police car was nearby watching. The officers didn't look too pleased with what they heard and General Taco seemed to be making sure they heard him clearly. I really hope this group has a positive agenda for helping the community but based on the message preached today on behalf of this group, there was nothing expressed that would leave you feeling like they're gonna make a positive difference. Any noise that they end up making probably wont be covered. It'll just be something heard on the street or they might get a few lines in the Sentinel newspaper, our so-called black newspaper...

General Taco spoke fearlessly but some of his young comrades really didn't strike me as being fearless. I didn't see dedication in their eyes. Some even appeared to look as if they wondered what the heck they got themselves into. I wonder about their lives when they're on their own. Do they have a home? Do they need someone or something to believe in and this is what they found? This young group is growing in numbers so I'm curious to see where they are by next year this time. Instead of calling themselves the new Black Panthers, they call themselves the "Black Ridah's." Ride on but do it with conviction, pride and a positive goal to truly help the community.

Venice

  

I was mesmerized by this gorgeous lady today while hanging out on Venice Beach near the boardwalk area. The moment I saw her I couldn't resist. I had to capture her somehow though it wasn't in the way that I wished the most... ya know...something like me being able to slide up to her and say, what!(ref. Morris Day in Purple Rain) This young lady had a boyfriend with her so the best I could do was photograph her. She knew it... The moment I noticed her, she noticed me but she played it off pretty good. Then, I kept shooting her until I could capture that moment when she'd sneak and acknowledge me with a smile.. As you can see above, the camera loved her. She'd be amazing to do a photoshoot with, showing various unspoken sides of her personality. I wondered what her voice was like. She seemed very playful and flirtatious. I saw her stop to smile and play with a little baby. She danced carefree to an E-40 song that was playing over a sound system in the area. She had a walk that was really cute and sexy... Cheers to this Venice beauty. I thank her for that brief flirtatious moment and I send a wish to the stars that we can meet again though I'm not trying to take her away from her boyfriend, but I wouldn't mind.. *wink*

Lately

  

Nah, this aint the beginning of a Stevie Wonder song but latey I've been having the strangest... umm funny things been happening to a brotha. Seems like I'm always running into folks who just want to tell me something. Maybe this is something that's gonna turn into a weekend ritual. A complete stranger opening up, telling me stuff and me having absolutely no idea why they chose me.. Last weekend was Raymond who I actually enjoyed chilling with at Starbucks. This past Saturday it was Yvette at the gas station. Thanks to a very slow chick behind the counter unable to figure out how much change to give someone, Yvette who stood next to me simply started talking... I saw her when she walked up. I looked at her for a few reasons. One was that she looked like a female wrestler with way too much muscle. Two was that she was showing a lot of cleavage. Three was that her face was so manly-like and her lipstick looked like she put it on blindfolded... And the main reason I looked at her was that she walked up and stood right beside me rather than behind me as most folks would do standing in line. I was almost about to give her that "WTF" look but despite her having too much muscle, her boobs looked soft so that caught my eye for a moment..lol. *smile*

Anyway, Yvette just started talking. She told me she had just come from a wedding and that the groom kept his eyes on her rather than the woman he was to marry. She said the groom even followed her to the bathroom at one point and let her know that he wanted her. Yvette was at the wedding because she's a friend of the bride. She said she couldn't stay at the reception for fear of messing things up. She looked at me and said in a dumb blondish sort of way, "I dont know why he was acting that way, geez!" The lady behind the counter approached so I said "I'll have twenty on number eleven, please..."

"Eleven on twenty?"

"Nah, twenty on eleven!" And then I replied to Yvette before walking away. "Perhaps next time you should wear a turtleneck, some long pants and an overcoat."

As I walked away she asked "is my dress not right for a wedding?"

"What dress?"

You could see her thong through the fabric of the dress and it had one string around the waist which made it look more like a skimpy outfit for bedtime. One pull of the string and that dress would open completely... Who's gonna be next to tell me something that makes me ponder the question "why did they just tell me that?"

Wait

  

I saw this brotha watching with envy a man and woman in the distance as he waited. I took the shot from my car and then pulled over a few blocks down to write the words that grabbed my attention...

Love makes you wait, unsatisfied like the morning dew drops that wont stop hitting your car. It blurs your vision. It's beautiful yet scrapes you deep enough to leave a scar. Something so lovely; a million miles dont even seem that far. It keeps you waiting no matter the struggle or the pain you go through. Proving yourself like you should be ashamed of something untrue. Like holding a mirror when there's nothing out of place. Seeking advice after you've proven to be strong; surviving unnecessary games. You wait because it's time. It would be nice to live again... Not unlike the love of a good friend, but more.. Like that good shit that makes you feel as close to wanting to confess a sin. That merry-go-round of life when you feel so high.. even with your eyes closed you can still see the sky.. Lean back for now and wait... Wait because you know you want to...

You

  

It wasn't you.. I knew that from the start. You with the three kids and a life with another man, spread so far apart. What we had was beautiful but friendship is all it was meant to be. If we were together you'd get tired of me. I'd need much more than you could give.. Time... be it in short intervals that placed emphasis on the kind of romance that a brotha like me needs to live... Together we are not capable; compatible...at least not in that way... So, offended by words you slid away mysteriously.. Kicked me to the curb so gently.. stopped caring so easily... so easily which is sad..almost hypocritically....thus... It wasn't you..

The one is out there looking for me unconsciously... The one whose heart mirrors my own. The one who right now is finishing every thought I make. Listening to every word I say because even without words, we speak the same way... She knows me.. she's the reason these words flow from the top of my head, tippy toeing from the bottom of my heart...

It wasn't you... the one who shared more with me than anyone else I've ever known. The one who I convinced myself would be the kind of love I could forever call my own. The one who believes she was born many lives ago in a place she knew nothing about until I took her there... Eating meat pies and walking amongst the spirits, you'd have to discover humility, sacrifice, and selfless-ness in order to truly hang with those people. No mood swings 'cause the moon is full. No trippin 'cause you cant force another to pay for what you owe.. The kind of love you want from one man and one man alone is easy... You got rid of the one who could... thus it wasn't you...

The one knows my eyes, she can read my soul...tell if I'm lonely, the kind of lie that feels old. She knows my shirt size, favorite color, what makes me laugh the hardest. She knows what makes me cry, what makes me tired...She knows the words that can put out my fire.. She represents everything I want but have yet to see.. She recognizes what's in my heart, my soul, and everything I believe.. She can embrace with a passion the kind of love we both crave. She'd have no worries about the responsibility of making sure I rest peacefully in my grave..

It wasn't you..the one who embraces negative change... Kick a friend to the curb because new man is insecure... I wish you well because I remember the stories, the hours, the effort to remain as friends... The times you shared family photographs on a beach front balcony with me. A night when I brought to life the very same white horse galloping through your dreams and disappearing in your heart. I showed you no matter what that sort of love was never far from your grasp...reachable...attainable... A dream is a beautiful representation of your sincerity...at least for that moment... Thus..I thank God it wasn't you but I wish you love no matter what you do... yesssss...it wasn't you...

The one laughs at me right now, trying to speak poetically, paving the way which leads me to her... Though actually, I'm not looking nor is she trying to find me. We both recognize that when it happens, it happens... When the moment is right, it's right.. It is what it is, when it is sort of thang... I thought I saw her today, laughing at me as I changed my flat tire. She said sorry. Told me I was the best looking flat tire changer she'd ever seen and then drove away in her black Escalade. But I didn't envy her. It made me laugh.. I enjoyed the moment for what it was and thus it made the frustration a lot more bearable... The one isn't waiting for me at happy hour. She's not at the movie theatre or in the bookstore. She's not on Crenshaw Blvd. She's not in Beverly Hills. She's not in another state. She's not anywhere that I can imagine but then again... she could be... maybe...perhaps..

On the set

  

Sunday I spent a little time on the real life set of a story I'm working on. It was a trip being in Compton on 108th Street, listening to the sounds of life. There was something always going on but it was a beautiful day too. It was crystal clear blue skies until a couple of fires broke out. Life over there keeps the local firemen constantly busy. I counted three times that the fire trucks were called to that street within a thirty minute time frame. Two were for an actual fire and one time was paramedic related. There was a bridge near a train track where I noticed an old pontiac trans am parked at. All of a sudden it caught on fire. The dark smoke filled the air instantly like one of those clouds before a tornado hits. The entire street was dark for a moment. It smelled like burning rubber and before you knew it, the fire trucks came rushing in. People filled the street for as long as the fire was burning. Some looking at the sky and holding their noses while others maintained their fascination with the burning car and the firemen preparing to put out the fire. Once they put it out, everyone returned back inside or behind the gates of their apartment buildings and homes. Further up the street there were a group of latino males yelling at each other and two police officers with their arms folded, standing and watching with amusement. Across the street from where I sat there was a black family, three male and one female in their front yard playing dominoes and listening to Julio G's westside radio show. Young kids would dart out into the street every once in a while just to chase a dog or a ball that got away from them. It was funny to watch this street. There was a certain rhythm to it that stayed the same until the occasional interuption occured like those fires breaking out, the fire trucks speeding by, and an occasional police car zooming by with flashing lights but no siren. The rhythm never stopped when those kids darted in and out of the street but when one lady shouted "Kenny get your ass out of that street!" everyone within earshot of her voice including the domino playing family stopped what they were doing for a few seconds to watch little Kenny walk with his head down as he returned to play behind the gate of his front yard. 108th Street was pretty cool. Absorbing the whole vibe of it in about 45 minutes time was a fun trip. I'll be back to capture more of it, visually and spiritually...

Hanging

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